Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Skin Deep.

I need thicker skin. Do you think they'll be selling it on Amazon this Christmas?

I'm finding that being a parent requires rhino skin.
I used to think park politics were tricky. Now I'm dealing with the Six year old's volatile emotions, the Baby's tantrums and the hurt feelings of friends on play dates and at school. Couple that with a little monthly phenomenon we won't detail but will simply call 'Aunt Flo' and I am feeling emotionaly worn out. It feels like I need to be a psychologist. Here's the thing - I'm not a psychologist. I'm a mom.

I would like to give myself credit for being a thoughtful mom and I do have significant training and experience in psychology. However, in the face of the current barrage - I just want to crawl into my bed and be left alone.

It's hard to remember that when a child makes another child sad, it's not a fault.
As a good friend of mine likes to say - it's an opportunity!
We can all learn about our words and their repercussions together.
Or we can tantrum, feel bad and have a cupcake to cheer ourselves up. Not that I would ever do that. I would, of course, use each experience to learn and grow. I would remain calm. I would not take it personally and blow the whole thing out of proportion.

There just wasn't enough time between being a rebellious teenager, a single twenty something with nothing but herself on her mind, a married thirty something who wants to travel and live life to the max and becoming a parent, for me to deal with all of the emotions I unwittingly dragged with me.
I needed a two year time out to get my head sorted out in preparation for being challenged on a daily basis by children. I didn't get the memo.

So, while TV and magazines barrage me with products to keep my skin soft, pliable and younger looking - I'm looking to add big, thick, resilient layers. I wonder if I'm going to start a trend.....

On a much less self involved note. Today I would like to thank all those who serve and have served. Who give in a way I can only imagine and to their families and loved ones who support them and miss them - I am grateful.


  1. Let me know if you find this magical product. I have a teenager, an autistic and a little princess living with me.

  2. Oh please, please let me know the secret when you find it.

  3. I was just thinking about something similar last night after having a phone conversation with a less-than-sensitive daughter of mine, 18, who can't resist telling me almost every time we talk that I did not turn out to be the mother she wishes I was. Most of the time I can chalk it up to her disability {schizophrenia/BPD} but last night it really bothered me.

    Sorry for the run-on comment - I found you via the SITS roll call.

  4. Reading your post and your sidebar, ITA with your philosophy! We as parents DO need to balance the scale. Here's hoping your book gets published :-)

    * from SITS

  5. I'm not a mom, but as a teacher I could certainly use an extra layer of skin. Even if it isn't permanent... I'd be willing to add one more step of putting it on every day. Let me know what your Amazon search finds!

  6. I actually think my skin is getting thicker. Either that or the haze of exhaustion is just more dense. :-)


  7. please let me know the secret when you find it. Work from home India


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