Thursday, August 2, 2012

Forever in PJ's.

You know how I know that my standards have changed since I had kids? There is only one picture of me on this blog. In it I am wearing turquoise pajamas. I like to think that no-one has noticed that because they are feasting their eyes on the gorgeousness that is my new born baby and her adoring big sister.

When I say "changed" I really mean deteriorated. It's inevitable - all the baby magazines warned me - my hair would live in a pony tail, I would consider sweat pants to be appropriate for everything except weddings. I think at some point I was supposed to return to my previous standards. My baby is four now - is it time?

I only ask because my friends are doing things like Brazilian blow outs, Botox and well, Brazilians. I am doing showers and make up for special events. Does it really matter? In my heart I know the answer and the answer for me is no. What matters is how I feel. How healthy I am. How my self esteem and confidence are. That's what I tell my girls - why would I not apply it to me too? Of course if looking polished is a part of that - that's fine too.

You know why this whole topic came up? BlogHer12. I am not at BlogHer12. Go pour yourself a nice drink while I take a break to go wipe my tears. Back? Good, me too. WHY AM I NOT AT BlogHer12????

This is where my standards have dropped in a way that IS unacceptable. I learned after teetering on the precipice of depression that can come with parenting that I need something else in my life to balance the mountainous challenge of parenting full time. For me that something else is writing and blogging. To be inspired and motivated I need to connect with my community in real life. That's what these conferences provide to me. Mentoring, fun, friendship, independence. Oh independence I miss you the most.

I sold my BlogHer pass because few of my besties were going. It wasn't an entirely bad decision except for one small detail - I could now be kid free in New York City for four days. So you can continue to look at my turquoise pj's but I am off to look for another conference or trip that will nourish my soul and maybe force me out of that pony tail and sweats...


  1. ME TOO! ME TOO! ME TOO! We should totally plan a girls weekend somewhere!!!!!!!!!!

  2. I think we all need to make sure we go next year. This has been so weird. I miss all of you so very much.

  3. I second that sigh. I'm glad I took the break, cause I couldn't really swing it financially, but I will MAKE it happen next year and you MUST be with me.


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