Hello Mother, Hello Father.

I need the phone number of the couple I horrified a few weeks back. I was not nearly honest or scary enough. Life in this house is now officially ridiculous.

We have been battling our own version of swine flu for 6 weeks now. In true family style we are passing it around like a plate of cookies. The husband has been sicker than I have ever seen him. I may even have to retract my 'man cold' joke as slander.

The kids are finally well but just to mix it up they decided to try the old tag teaming routine again. I went to bed exhausted after looking after everyone and fell into a blissful deep sleep. Cue six year old who burst through the bedroom door announcing a "bleed nose." This would have been enough drama at 1am but she startled me and I wrenched my neck. I now have about 20% movement and an eye popping amount of pain. Ideal for mopping up a blood splattered child and her bed.

I finally got the 'blood nose' to stop and the six year old settled back in bed.
Exactly 45 minutes later I am woken by a persistent tapping on my arm.
"Mama, I can't get back to sleep. Can I have some sleeping potion?"
Sleeping potion is a genius invention of the husband. It involves cranberry juice and some pretend sprinkling of various magic herbs. It also involves a trip downstairs to the fridge. I dutifully trudge down to make it. I know the six year old well enough to understand that she will not be sleeping without it, no matter what I do. It's also an ideal opportunity to pop some ibuprofen for the hideous neck pain.

Potion consumed the six year old settles back in, as do I.
Cue baby. In honor of the secret code of tag teaming - she waited just enough time for me to fall back asleep before she started crying. I am yet to find a reason for the tears but after 20 mins I got her re-settled. It is now 3am. I look at the clock and think, 3-4 hours sleep coming up - not too bad. Wrong.
The baby got up at 4am for the day.
I'm thinking Summer Camp. They take infants right?

p.s. Did you vote for me today?