Elf On The Shelf.

If you've been reading for a while you'll know that I am a little obsessed (is that like being a little bit pregnant?) with making sweet childhood memories with my kids. I like tradition. The difficulty is that my children are growing up in a different country than I did. Traditions are different. Their childhoods and mine are, in many ways, chasms apart so I am always looking out for new traditions we can start together.
Enter Elf on The Shelf. I had never heard of this pesky sprite until last year. This year he seems to be everywhere I go - Pinterest, at my favorite book store, Facebook. People seem to be having a lot of fun with their elf - so I decided we would too.

I ordered him - he's a little pricey so I was anxious for his arrival. He came in time for the December count down and I was not disappointed. The book is great. Funny, well written, age appropriate. The perfect way to issue the Santa Ultimatum (Santa will not come if you're bad) without actually having to be the bad guy. Genius!
While I fully appreciate that a momma (especially when hormonally compromised) has to do what a momma has to do, I really do think playing the 'Santa won't come' card - is evil. Having a cute little elf do it for you - fully acceptable.

Here's my problem. Why does there have to always be a problem I hear you ask? Well let's face it - if there wasn't a problem, this would just be an advertisement. The Elf - we call ours Fisbee - is very cute. My kids love him. He comes with clear (and strict) instructions which they are willing to adhere too. They run giddy round the house looking for him each morning BUT it's right there in the title - Elf on The Shelf. This Elf can no better sit on a shelf than he can sing and dance. He is not able to sit upright unaided. Elf on The Floor, Elf Slumped Over, Elf Who's Been at the Brandy would be much more accurate.

Elf Who Needs to Be Wedged Up Against Something is what he really is. As a busy overworked, underpaid mom who tends to remember approximately 20 mins after she gets into bed that the Elf needs a new location - I really need this Elf to be happy to sit anywhere. My wedging options are limited. I have seen some very clever mommies posting their very clever Elf On The Shelf lying down making a snow angel in sugar pictures on Pinterest. Good for them. In my house there is about a 30 second window for Elf placement. Elf Fallen Off and Crumpled on the Floor does not have quite the same child delighting effect.
Elf On The Shelf may have too poor a shelf life for this parent.