Friday, October 29, 2010

This Is The Place.

Over the past few weeks I have been witness to a few 'mom meltdowns.'
Fully justified mom meltdowns, I should add.

The kind where a mom is deeply sleep deprived. The kind where the kids are acting out or sick.
That place we have all been and will get to go to again, all too soon.
Burned out, exhausted, frustrated, depleted.

Not the 'OMG! I asked for a latte and this is a Cappuccino' kind of meltdown that I also see all too often.

Without exception, each of these moms cried - understandable.
Without exception, each of them apologized for crying.
This is not so understandable.

Where did we go wrong in our culture that we feel the need to apologize for crying?
Crying because we are at the end of our rope.
Crying because it is so hard to get through the day we just can't see how we're going to continue.
We seem to be universally embarrassed to cry.

I would like to declare a - This Is The Place Policy.
When you are at mom's group, girl's night out, on the phone with a friend, reading your favorite parenting blog - This Is The Place. This is where you can cry, meltdown and whine with impunity.
NO APOLOGIES necessary.
Scratch that no apologies ALLOWED.

No feeling that you are bringing down the mood.
No thinking you need to put on a front.
No thinking you are the only one who can't cope.

To reach out.
To get a hug.
To hear supportive words and get advice.
To let it out.

Let's give ourselves and each other permission to be honest, vulnerable and get love and support in return - whenever, wherever we need it. Well maybe not at Weddings or Bat Mitzvahs but everywhere else.
Oooh I feel all warm and fuzzy now.


  1. This is my favorite post you've ever written! (That I've read, I should add - I haven't read your complete archives -- yet!) AND it reduced me to tears and I'm NOT apologizing. I've had a hell of a day, of a week, etc...and I so wish I lived close to you so I could come over to your house and have a cup of tea and BAWL. :)

  2. Come on and make my shoulder wet. It's big enough for all your frustrations and exhaustion...Don't hold back, just let it all out! It's like a bucket full of water that you collected and can empty now, so you have an empty one to start with. There you are, you feel better?
    Love Amelie


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