Over six years of parenting I have learned that it's not so much what I say but what I do that counts. Darn.
That makes the whole tricky journey trickier - to say the least.
My girls are watching everything I do. The baby wants to copy everything. Note to self - must stop removing my wedgie in public.
Luckily she's still young enough that she can't repeat my verbal transgressions. No such luck with the six year old.
The husband and I have made the classic slip ups. It's easy to blurt out a less than sociable word when someone cuts you off in traffic. The fact that the kids are not in your direct view makes you forget they are back there. oh dear.
Luckily the six year old is very motivated by rewards so I managed to convince her not to repeat my 'bad choice' word. So far so good.
Not so with my actions.
Yesterday the six year old had a friend over. It was getting near to the time for her friend to leave so I asked them to pick up the room. The friend did some professional level stalling. The six year old got frustrated. I could hear the edge in her voice so I went to intervene.
I arrive at the door to see the six year old in a bold stance, her finger is pointed firmly at her friend as she says,
"PICK IT UP. What is it that YOU. DON'T. UNDERSTAND?"
As she says this the hips sway, the finger wags and she leans in closer to get her finger closer to her friends face.
Yikes. I see myself in that manoeuvre.
Of course I don't want her to talk to her friends that way so we have a chat about friendly words. I feel like a complete hypocrite.
Since it's my actions that seem to count I am planning a Martha Stewart/Julie Andrews scenario for dinner. Frilly apron, a sweet smile, an encouraging song and maybe even cupcakes.
It is so scary to see us in our children. Even scarier to see our mother's in ourselves!
ReplyDeleteOh good grief, I can so relate to this one. And why is it that the habits I like least in my kiddos are the ones I see in myself most? Ugh, this motherhood thing....
ReplyDeleteYou can't go wrong with a little Julie Andrews action around the house.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, I have seen and heard my kid heave big exaggerated sighs of frustration and thought, oops. That's me.
My daughter copies my every move too. Especially when I am reprimanding her brothers.
ReplyDeleteI just was saying this to someone else!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter likes to say, "No, uh-uh" To everything now...especially to her baby brother. I say "uh-uh" a lot apparently. Never knew it. LOL.
Oh no! My almost five year old said to me the other day, "What part of NO do you not understand?" So wrong!
ReplyDeleteGood luck. SITS shout out!
Alex
I have 4 girls that are mirroring my every acting and in a way it drives me crazy, especially when it's not so pleasant. But they do see that it's a sign of affection!
ReplyDeleteNice post on The Parenting Myth and it helps a lot.
ReplyDeleteIf you are a person who want to learn about parenting and love your family then you should enjoy
the content of this blog http://todayscliche.com/. Because I did and hope you would love too.
You have a nice blog. Keep up the good work.
Thanks,
keval
Kids are like sponges...they'll pick up anything and retain it. If not from you, then from someone else - unfortunately! The best we can do is love our kids and try not to make slip-ups!
ReplyDelete~WM
So true. My husband is STILL hearing about when our (then) 18 month old walked around for DAYS saying, "Nice blinker b*tch!" She's 10 now but still a vivid memory. LOL!
ReplyDeleteThat makes me laugh! We have "mommy words" at our house. The bad side is that everyone knows I use them, the good side is that the kids just call them "mommy words" instead of saying them!
ReplyDelete